Davidsons living in plan b: A Grateful Ending

Our infertility is the heaviest on my mind during the holiday season. I think about increasing our family and starting holiday traditions together, having the opportunity to teach them the power of giving to those who are in need, and the importance of love, family, and togetherness. Unfortunately, the last few holidays have brought me reminders of yet another failed year of trying to conceive. I have always been big on collecting ornaments from the Giving Tree and Sub for Santa because it allows me to remember my youth during the holidays, and all the wonderful people who were true blessings to my family. In addition, I discovered that being able to give back has helped fill the void that weighs heavy during this time of year. I told Tyler I wanted to do more this year to help me feel the Christmas spirit. I want to keep the tradition of taking Grandma Barbie to see Christmas, I want to do more with each other, friends, and family, I'll give canned food to the food bank, I want to take an ornament off the Giving Tree any time I see one rather than limiting it to one tree, I want to do random acts of kindness, etc. My amazing mother-in-law, Michelle, decided we aren't exchanging gift this year AT ALL...no exceptions! She wants to adopt a family to give gifts to instead, and I loved her more when she texted me this.

I knew no amount of giving would get rid of my pain, but it has definitely lessened how I felt this time around. I had the wonderful opportunity to spend Thanksgiving with all of my siblings and mother. This is something we have not been able to do in years. Morgan and Zac also asked Tyler and me to babysit Drayze for a couple of days so they could leave town, and how could we say no to that offer?! Therefore, I was surrounded with laughter, smiles, reminiscing, and happiness for four days straight. I sat in my living room looking at all the beautiful people in our house, and thought to myself how lucky I am.

Even facing so many disappointments, I can honestly say we had one of the most productive years so far. 2014 definitely threw us some curve balls, but all in all, I'm so grateful for what 2014 has brought us. The Seattle Seahawks won the Super Bowl, we bought a house, I got my Master's, got a job closer to home, Tyler is just about finished with school (finally!), and I feel like we are getting closer to figuring out this infertility business. I realized I have so much more to appreciate than I have ever realized recently. More than anything, I am grateful for family. They have helped us both get to the place of feeling at ease with where we are in life. I know ending the year, and starting 2015 with this feeling in my heart will only bring us more happiness and optimism when embarking on a new year.

Our Molyneaux family! We don't get to see them as much, but they never fail to support us. Thank you for being so willing to do more than expected to help us fulfill our dreams. We love you guys and appreciate your efforts!!

Our Davidson famdamly...I felt like a creeper hunting down pictures of you all. We all spend so much time together, yet there's not an updated picture with all of us! Regardless, we love each one of you. You all share such an optimistic attitude, and the Davidsons stick together through everything. You guys are always there for us. Having all of you in our lives means so much, and we could not be more thankful for the example you are to us.

It amazes me how much a little spirit can change someone's life. I am soooo grateful that Morgan and Zac allow me to watch this little guy every Monday. Spending time with him has taught me so much and lets me be grateful for all I have. He inspires me to do more and to never give up on my dream of being a mommy. Thank you, Drizzy Drayze, for being my little buddy. I love you so much.

A Brown family Thanksgiving